Forever and Always!
I haven't been publishing any blogs the past year or more. There are numerous posts that I had started and never published in this phase because
1. I am lost half way through
2. Altogether a newer idea pops up and I start writing on that while I was writing on something totally unrelated
3. I reread and I don't feel like I have done any justice
And thereeee..its all saved in my drafts even today. Note to self- Devote sometime sooner to sort this mess.
What pushed me into finally writing and publishing one today is something very terrible (for the lack of words) and something I never saw coming. Praveen Moses
I met this chap for the first time at my workplace and we were sorta in the same batch of Freshers who joined the organization. It hardly took anytime for us to get along well..Cancerians have this inborn talent of falling in swing when they identify a fellow cancerian. And we were a proud one too! While he came across as the tough nut for most of my colleagues for his Black and White approach, for me he was someone special. I never had to ask him to do anything for me. He understood and was literally there for me always. As years passed by our bond only grew stronger and I found nothing but unending love and care from this guy who turned out to be my Mentor, Guide, My big brother. There hasn't been a day at work without us being at each other's neck! We loved it though! He blended well very soon and I was introduced to his close friends (since skool!), one of whom continues to be my best friend today. Praveen taught me innumerable life lessons..To say 'No' when I had to, how to be brave, how to deal with situations, how to stop overthinking..and the list goes on.
He was my punch bag, a shoulder to lean on and he always, always had my back. We were comfortable in sharing our own little secrets with each other knowing that it is very well safe guarded. The amount of Pinky Promises we have made!! God, I am laughing while I type this with a tear in my eye. He was always right in his assessment about what is going to happen next. And when things do go the way he predicts I always spew him with verbal abuse and still he was there to hug me and tell me 'It's ok" and "I told you so" all at the same time! Such was his ways of dealing with me and my never ending tantrums. We loved each other no matter what.
The 26th of June 2016- One day that I will never forget in this life. We were all at Madurai to attend the wedding of this best friend of mine whom I knew through Praveen. Two days of fun, meeting all their old friends, the gang pulling each others legs, never ending discussions, tour de his college, a miserable mobile that stopped working which Praveen ran around to get a new one and what not! We were planning to leave back to Bangalore the same night and Praveen having rode to Madurai on his bike decided to start early since he didn't want to ride overnight. We all waved him a bye from the wedding hall, with me pulling his leg that we are anyways gonna kill each other when we are at Bangalore and so to save the Good bye for the others who were from different other places.
It was 5.16 pm exactly when I receive a call on my mobile from Praveen's number. The screen blinked 'Twin' calling..Yes, that's what we call each other...that he is my Evil twin! I was wondering why on earth was he calling me while he was riding and I was prepared to throw abuses on him. Well, what awaited me is something that will stay there in my mind forever. There was someone who called me and said the person riding this bike met with an accident and he is no more!! I thought my twin was as usual playing a prank and I screamed asking him to stop the drama. How I wished it was just a Prank call! I have no idea what I did for the next few minutes. All I remember is me frantically trying to find out if it was true. I was praying that someone will call and tell me, it wasn't him..a mistaken identity. God seemed to not have heard me at all that day. The epitome of the situation now was how to tell his wife who was there with us. I was panicking and finally one of Praveen's friends just told me 'That's it Vimala.. Think what next'. My Appa was telling me the same, and he was surprised hearing me cry like a baby. I had lost my Twin! What unfolded next between me and Yashwanth (Praveen's close friend) was Zero Emotions, get things done. We had the daunting task of reaching Namakkal where the accident had happened (some 240 kms away) taking Shameena- Praveen's wife with us and arrange whatever is needed.
If Praveen was around, he would have told me the same thing, to think what next. I just assumed he wanted me to and started informing everyone.I battled my emotions for the next 19 hours and when they finally took him in a ambulance from the mortuary I just broke down. I was very clear that I didn't want to see him so, since all I wanted in my memory was the ever smiling face- with that unquestionable smirk. And hence I didn't even make an attempt to see him one last time. The one last image etched in my memory is that of us pulling each others legs while he was leaving from the wedding hall and that will do. Praveen had a world of friends and well wishers around him. They all were calling me frantically as shocked as we were if the news was even true. The most heartbreaking thing was when I had to break the news to his Grandparents for whom he was the world. It took me sometime to come to terms that this was indeed true. God is cruel indeed to take him back too soon. But I strongly believe, this happened for a reason as well. Though I miss him everyday I know he is watching over me. He is still there to guide me, in whatever ways he can.
To the one best friend, Brother, Evil Twin..You are loved, Cherished forever and always. Thank you for the world of memories..A Big tight hug
PS- This post is republished; originally posted in July 2016
Vive!
Me Myself
1. I am lost half way through
2. Altogether a newer idea pops up and I start writing on that while I was writing on something totally unrelated
3. I reread and I don't feel like I have done any justice
And thereeee..its all saved in my drafts even today. Note to self- Devote sometime sooner to sort this mess.
What pushed me into finally writing and publishing one today is something very terrible (for the lack of words) and something I never saw coming. Praveen Moses
I met this chap for the first time at my workplace and we were sorta in the same batch of Freshers who joined the organization. It hardly took anytime for us to get along well..Cancerians have this inborn talent of falling in swing when they identify a fellow cancerian. And we were a proud one too! While he came across as the tough nut for most of my colleagues for his Black and White approach, for me he was someone special. I never had to ask him to do anything for me. He understood and was literally there for me always. As years passed by our bond only grew stronger and I found nothing but unending love and care from this guy who turned out to be my Mentor, Guide, My big brother. There hasn't been a day at work without us being at each other's neck! We loved it though! He blended well very soon and I was introduced to his close friends (since skool!), one of whom continues to be my best friend today. Praveen taught me innumerable life lessons..To say 'No' when I had to, how to be brave, how to deal with situations, how to stop overthinking..and the list goes on.
He was my punch bag, a shoulder to lean on and he always, always had my back. We were comfortable in sharing our own little secrets with each other knowing that it is very well safe guarded. The amount of Pinky Promises we have made!! God, I am laughing while I type this with a tear in my eye. He was always right in his assessment about what is going to happen next. And when things do go the way he predicts I always spew him with verbal abuse and still he was there to hug me and tell me 'It's ok" and "I told you so" all at the same time! Such was his ways of dealing with me and my never ending tantrums. We loved each other no matter what.
The 26th of June 2016- One day that I will never forget in this life. We were all at Madurai to attend the wedding of this best friend of mine whom I knew through Praveen. Two days of fun, meeting all their old friends, the gang pulling each others legs, never ending discussions, tour de his college, a miserable mobile that stopped working which Praveen ran around to get a new one and what not! We were planning to leave back to Bangalore the same night and Praveen having rode to Madurai on his bike decided to start early since he didn't want to ride overnight. We all waved him a bye from the wedding hall, with me pulling his leg that we are anyways gonna kill each other when we are at Bangalore and so to save the Good bye for the others who were from different other places.
It was 5.16 pm exactly when I receive a call on my mobile from Praveen's number. The screen blinked 'Twin' calling..Yes, that's what we call each other...that he is my Evil twin! I was wondering why on earth was he calling me while he was riding and I was prepared to throw abuses on him. Well, what awaited me is something that will stay there in my mind forever. There was someone who called me and said the person riding this bike met with an accident and he is no more!! I thought my twin was as usual playing a prank and I screamed asking him to stop the drama. How I wished it was just a Prank call! I have no idea what I did for the next few minutes. All I remember is me frantically trying to find out if it was true. I was praying that someone will call and tell me, it wasn't him..a mistaken identity. God seemed to not have heard me at all that day. The epitome of the situation now was how to tell his wife who was there with us. I was panicking and finally one of Praveen's friends just told me 'That's it Vimala.. Think what next'. My Appa was telling me the same, and he was surprised hearing me cry like a baby. I had lost my Twin! What unfolded next between me and Yashwanth (Praveen's close friend) was Zero Emotions, get things done. We had the daunting task of reaching Namakkal where the accident had happened (some 240 kms away) taking Shameena- Praveen's wife with us and arrange whatever is needed.
If Praveen was around, he would have told me the same thing, to think what next. I just assumed he wanted me to and started informing everyone.I battled my emotions for the next 19 hours and when they finally took him in a ambulance from the mortuary I just broke down. I was very clear that I didn't want to see him so, since all I wanted in my memory was the ever smiling face- with that unquestionable smirk. And hence I didn't even make an attempt to see him one last time. The one last image etched in my memory is that of us pulling each others legs while he was leaving from the wedding hall and that will do. Praveen had a world of friends and well wishers around him. They all were calling me frantically as shocked as we were if the news was even true. The most heartbreaking thing was when I had to break the news to his Grandparents for whom he was the world. It took me sometime to come to terms that this was indeed true. God is cruel indeed to take him back too soon. But I strongly believe, this happened for a reason as well. Though I miss him everyday I know he is watching over me. He is still there to guide me, in whatever ways he can.
To the one best friend, Brother, Evil Twin..You are loved, Cherished forever and always. Thank you for the world of memories..A Big tight hug
PS- This post is republished; originally posted in July 2016
Vive!
Me Myself
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